We're Engaged- Should We Buy a House First or Plan the Wedding?

This is a question coming up more and more often among newly engaged couples, and sometimes is something that can be hard to agree on even between two halves of the same partnership.

The fantasy of settling down with your partner into a new home after the honeymoon can be disrupted by the reality of budgeting for a wedding AND a new home at the same time. More and more couples are opting to delay or significantly minimize wedding expenses to find a home first.

According to weddingbells.ca the average Canadian wedding in 2015 cost $30,717 (including the honeymoon) http://www.weddingbells.ca/planning/wedding-trends-in-canada-2015/), that same money could be a 10% downpayment on a $300,000 home in London!

Of course, not all couples are spending that kind of money, but even a modest wedding could easily cost between 5-10k which is enough to seriously start looking at putting a down payment together for a first home. So, do you skip the wedding and buy a house? Or do you tie the knot and rent for a few more years while you save for your first home?

For some people, the decision is simple. Angie, 30, says:

"For us, the decision was easy to buy a home ahead of time. It saved us money long term. (no more rent) Rather investing in our long-term future. The house was put just under my name, but our lawyer did a great job explaining how it all worked and how James [my future husband] would be protected once we were married. "

Krysten agrees:

"If we could only do a house or wedding a house it would be [a house] hands down!"

A large part of this will come down to lifestyle. Your home is where you spend a huge percentage of your time and where you will create memories with each other, friends and family. It's worth getting preapproved and seeing what you can afford in your area.

Picture the lifestyle in a home in your price range vs. renting. Is it possible you will save money on a monthly by buying vs. renting, and be able to save for a wedding in the near future? Or will you have to stretch your monthly budget to buy something in the area you want to settle down in?

A starter home is an opportunity to start building equity but doesn't have to be your ultimate dream home. You can make some concessions on the size, area, and finishes on your first place and move in a few years- in fact: the average homeowner in Canada is in each home less than 5 years!

Comparing your first home against what you would be renting can help you to keep it in perspective. To keep the budget and upkeep lower, there are options in condos as well including apartment and townhouse style that will give you more flexibility than renting while you build equity.

For some couples, living together before tying the knot simply isn't an option they would consider.

Jenna, 27, explains:

"We both grew up in religious families and it was important, to me especially, that we get married before finding moving in together. We decided to rent an apartment to start as house hunting while preparing for the wedding simply wasn't something I was prepared to do. We found our first home together about a year later and we couldn't be happier. The time we spent renting gave us an opportunity to explore open houses, figure out what was important to us and what we could compromise on."

Deciding to buy a home before the wedding is a big decision. Couples should carefully review all paperwork with their lawyer to ensure they are both protected: the family law act and protections don't extend to non-married couples. A cohabitation agreement and reviewing the various types of ownership arrangements could save you both some headaches in the future.

As far as support from friends and family, most people I asked got lots of support in their decision no matter what they did. As long as you are confident and happy, making the decision to buy a home rather than spend a ton on a wedding, or making the decision to get married first and wait to make the leap into homeownership are BOTH worthy options.

Of course, if you have the budget to do both, why not? Just make sure you call me (I like both cake and househunting!).

-Heather

www.londongunn.com